Muppet Fan's Muppet Collection Chronicle: Justin Piatt

Justin H. Piatt - Hi! Just felt like showing off a few things. To help me in doing so, I've acquired the assistance of my lovely assistant... some weird, random monster thing. (My apologies for the poor quality, as I have yet to join the rest of civilization in the 21st Century)

My CD collection: I don't have all that many, but I hope to expand. Pictured above:  Platinum All-Time Favorites; Platinum Too; Old School: Volume 1; Fraggle Rockin': A Collection; Kermit Unpigged; Music, Mayhem and More!; Best of the Muppets; The Green Album; The Muppets (soundtrack) – Naturally, all have been listened to far too much.

Next up, The Muppet Show Comic Book! I'm only missing Sherlock Holmes and the last three Muppet Mash comics... and of course, The Four Seasons series.

Here are the only Muppet dolls I own: A giant Baby Kermit that I found at FYE (wearing overalls, for some reason), a Baby Rowlf beanie, Gobo Fraggle (from Hot Topic), and a Doozer. Also, you'll notice two very different pairs of Kermit the Frog slippers. Cozy!

This is my Muppet magazine collection: Big Bird on the cover of TIME magazine; Bunsen and Beaker on the cover of Wired; Kermit the Frog on the cover of Entertainment Weekly; Disney twenty-three; and two issues of the Star Wars Insider... Well, see, the one has a Frank Oz interview, and the other has a series of articles all about Star Wars on The Muppet Show, including one that tries to fit the episode into the Star Wars timeline.

Muppet postage stamps – two sheets of the wonderful stamps that went out of date far too quickly. I had bought five of these, and used three.

Muppet Monopoly – Nothing rare. Just the best edition of Monopoly ever.

This is my collection of Muppet photos: Four that I received from Disney with The Muppets blu-ray, a group photo, three from Muppets Tonight, and a photo of Miss Piggy from Muppet Treasure Island. Can you believe Henson used to just give these things away? Oh, yeah! I almost forgot. That’s my personalized autograph from Frank Oz up in the corner. … No big.

My collection of Muppet books (and there are a lot of them): The Muppets Big Book of Crafts; The Diva Code; It's Hard Out Here for a Shrimp; Before You Leap; Muppet Babies' Classic Children's Tales; My Memory Book; Tale of Sand; Miss Piggy's Guide to Life; The Muppets: The Movie Junior Novel; The Muppets Make Puppets!; The Muppet Show Book; It's Not Easy Being Green; Sesame Street: A Celebration - 40 Years of Life on the Street; No Strings Attached; Jim Henson: The Works; Street Gang; The Wisdom of Big Bird; Memoirs of a Muppets Writer; Sesame Street Unpaved

Additionally, my copy of Street Gang is signed by Michael Davis, and my copy of The Wisdom of Big Bird is signed by both Caroll Spinney and Big Bird. I also have a few photos from the signing, which I wasn’t able to attend, but a very kind, fellow Muppet fan got this for me.

Ah! Muppet DVDs. This could take some time to list: Muppets Magic from the Ed Sullivan Show (complete with hideous cover); The Muppet Show Seasons 1-3, The Best of the Muppet Show Volumes 3, 4, and 10; The Muppet Movie; The Great Muppet Caper; The Muppets Take Manhattan; The Muppet Christmas Carol; Muppet Treasure Island; Muppets From Space; Kermit’s Swamp Years; It’s a Very Merry Muppet Christmas Movie; A Muppet Christmas: Letters to Santa; The Muppets Wizard of Oz; The Muppets

Sesame Street DVDs: Old School Volume 1; Old School Volume 2; Follow That Bird; 20 Years and Still Counting; Elmo in Grouchland; 40 Years of Sunny Days; Sesame Street Spoofs Volume 1; Being Elmo

Fantasy and other DVDs: Dinosaurs – The Complete Series; Dog City; Henson’s Place; The Dark Crystal; Labyrinth; Song of the Cloud Forest; Animated Fraggle Rock; Emmet Otter’s Jugband Christmas; Saturday Night Live – The Complete First Season; Fraggle Rock – The Complete Series

And last, but far from least, is this: My hand-written letter from Caroll Spinney. I love this. It’s one of the best things I own, and it even has a sketch of Big Bird on it from Caroll! I love the Picklepuss stationary and envelope, and the 23-year old postcard (signed by Oscar and Big Bird) that he sent with it. I can’t express how much this means to me, and I only wish this picture did it justice.

Well, that’s about all my stuff. I like it pretty well.






The Muppet Mindset by Ryan Dosier, muppetmindset@gmail.com

So, You Think The Muppets Are Above Fart Jokes?

So, You Think the Muppets Are Above Fart Jokes?

Justin H. Piatt - There has been a lot of buzz around the internet about the newest Muppet movie, The Muppets. A lot of positive, wonderful buzz, but it hasn't gone without its negative press either. While I would love to sit here and refute all of the negative comments that have been going around about the upcoming movie, I realize that I can't. I don't know that these people are wrong, just like they don't know that they're right. There is, however, one issue that can easily be proven false, and it is that topic which will be discussed in the following.

You may have heard several people complaining about Fozzie's "fart shoes" gag, as seen in the trailers for the new movie. Those people claim that the Muppets are above fart jokes or toilet humor. It is to this statement that I say... Really?

Join me, won't you, as we examine...

GREAT MOMENTS IN MUPPET FARTSTORY

or...

MUPPETS: THE STRAIGHT POOP

or...

FARTING IN THE TIME OF HENSON

...I came up with a lot of titles.

I'll preface this article by saying that no examples will be submitted from the last twenty years of Muppet productions. That would be too easy with obvious examples such as Miss Piggy's "I've gotta pee" line in Muppets From Space. Or half the lines in The Muppets' Wizard of Oz. No, the fart jokes contained in the following article will have come from BEFORE 1990!

*GASP*

I know what you're thinking. You're thinking, "MY GOD! Jim Henson would NEVER talk about potties!" or "The Muppets never did that!" or maybe even "Jim Henson farted?" Well, guess what. He did. ...Maybe.

The Great Muppet Caper
The first feature film directed by Jim Henson is a classic, a gem, and perhaps my favorite movie of all time. It's funny, it's sweet, and... there's a scene that takes place in a bathroom. Not only does the scene take place in the bathroom, but the Muppets are actually waiting (impatiently) to use said bathroom. And apparently they really, really, really have to go. They even break the door down!

Now, this scene is clever. It's funny. And it's about... bodily functions? Weird. But, there you have it. The Muppets are not above toilet humor. Do you really need more proof? Yes, you do.

The Muppets Take Manhattan
Ah, the Frank Oz directed film so dear to every Muppet fan's heart. Can you believe it? Kermit the Frog and Miss Piggy are finally getting married. Not only that, but they're getting married on Broadway! It's like a dream come true! This is the Muppets. It's sweet, it's funny, and there's a real, live priest in it! There's a fart joke!

That’s right. There's a fart joke in it. Oh, well. Movie's ruined forever, right? Thanks for destroying the Muppets, Frank Oz, Jim Henson, and company! But, seriously, the moment when all the Muppets turn to see if Rowlf has let one rip is actually really, really funny, isn't it? You didn't mind it at all, did you? Nope, not until I pointed it out to you.

Dog City
Everyone loved Dog City. The Jim Henson Hour may have failed, but Dog City remains one of the best pieces from Jim's later career. It also has a lot of innuendo in it, and at least two toilet jokes. Who can forget the following exchanges?

Colleen: "Quick! Where's the nearest hydrant?"
Ace Yu: "No time for that now. Can't you see we've got a fire to fight?"

Or how about when Ace and Colleen nearly drove into the river?
Colleen: "Oh, my. We almost got wet!"
Ace Yu: "What do you mean, 'almost'?"

There. See? More of this filth!

Labyrinth
Okay. This isn't a Muppet movie. But isn't it a beloved favorite of the 1980s? The Jim Henson directed film from a Jim Henson story is fondly remembered by many. But, oh, yeah, there are no less than 70 fart jokes in this movie. That's right... 70. Jim Henson made a movie with more than 70 fart jokes in it. (Or, more accurately, a movie with one joke of 70 farts.) Crazy, right? But I bet you still love the movie.

See? The Muppets are not above fart jokes, and there are numerous other examples that we could cite (A Muppet Family Christmas, anyone?). Thing is, when the Muppets do do them (tee hee), they're usually fairly clever. Based on the context of the "fart shoes" gag, I'm fairly certain this is still the case. In my opinion, there's nothing wrong with fart jokes or toilet humor if they're done well (most are not--see Shrek). And, seriously, ONE joke in this movie is going to turn you off to the whole thing?

The Muppets have always been about low brow humor mixed with high brow humor mixed with a lot of heart. That's what I expect from the Muppets, and that's what I expect from The Muppets, and that's why the Muppets are not above fart jokes.

To conclude this article, I will borrow a word from Jason Segel : Lawyered.

 






The Muppet Mindset by Ryan Dosier, ryguy102390@gmail.com

Spoiler-Free Review(s) of "The Mupepts" Movie Junior Novel

Review of The Muppets: The Movie Junior Novel

Adapted by Katharine Turner

Based on the script by Jason Segel and Nick Stoller

Arianne Gallagher - Hello again, fellow Muppet fans! I'm glad to be back providing you with another book review. Of course, this book is the big one, the one and only The Muppets: The Movie Junior Novel! I pre-ordered the paperback as well as downloading the Kindle version as soon as it was available. The Kindle version is available for $5 and the paperback is available for $6 on Amazon.com and at Wal-Mart. For those of you who are avoiding spoilers until the movie comes out, I suggest buying the book after you see the movie, because once you get the book, the temptation is too great and it is impossible to put it down! I promise not to reveal any spoilers so read on!

As suggested by the title, this book is designed for a "junior" audience, but as for a 25 year old Muppet fan, I LOVED THIS BOOK! With 150 pages, plus 8 pages of color photos from the film, it's an easy read with a truly, truly wonderful story!

The book does a great job of laying the foundation of the movie plot. There are great little tidbits of dialogue throughout, but the book does a good job of not spewing out every little gag and detail. None of the celebrity cameos are named--the book instead says "a famous celebrity" is there and helping out or whatever. I think the book does exactly what it is supposed to do: tell the story of the movie. It focuses on the Muppets and their relationships, with each other and newcomers Walter, Gary, and Mary. If the book is any indication of what the movie is going to be like, we are in for a wonderful and heart-wrenching experience at the theaters.

The story of The Muppets, as told by the novel, is full of the heart, humor, and honesty that we Muppet fans adore. You can easily tell that the story was written by people who know and love the Muppets. Admiration and respect for the characters really comes out in the book. Each Muppet is presented as a multi-dimensional character--not just "Kermit the leader," "Fozzie the insecure comedian," or "Miss Piggy the diva." All of the Muppets, and the humans as well, have significant depth in terms of what happened to them after they broke up and the issues and emotions they have getting back together again.

The story is not about a major plotline where the writers just fill in with characters as they fit, it's totally the other way around. They have written the story based on the characters and their relationships with one another. The book only focuses on a small cast of main characters: Gary, Mary, Walter, Kermit, Fozzie, Piggy, Gonzo, Uncle Deadly, Tex Richman, and Veronica (the network executive). It's easy to tell where other characters will be utilized though, however, for fans who don't know the characters as well, it would have been nice to include more of the Muppet cast into the novel.

There are a few interesting plot elements in the book, such as the conflicts that existed between the Muppets themselves and the individual reasons why they left. The plot and the story of the movie highlights what we as Muppet fans love most about the Muppets: heart, humor, and honesty, plain and simple! The story brings out the best in the characters and one of Jim Henson's life mottos: people are basically good and when the Muppets come together, great things can happen.

I wholeheartedly recommend this book as a great compliment to the movie, either as a great precursor to it, or as a great supplement to it. I am more excited than ever to see the film, thinly hanging on to my sanity while waiting to see The Muppets in the theaters. I think fans are going to be very pleased with this book and, thus, the movie. As the die-hard Muppet fan I am I say for all to read, "Finally, something we can truly be proud of!"

-The Muppets: The Movie Junior Novel Review-

Justin H. Piatt - The other day, I was wandering through the book section of my local grocery store hoping to find a copy of the new Muppet joke book, Frogs Are Funny (blatant cross-promotion unintentional... and thus unblatant). Whilst browsing, I happened upon the brand new book The Muppets: The Movie Junior Novel. I wondered about the title a moment, thinking (mistakenly) that "movie junior novel" made no sense, and that it should perhaps be "junior movie novel" instead. Well, that just makes it sound like a junior movie, leading one to wonder what happened to the senior movie. "Novel movie junior" made even less sense, and "movel jovier nunio..." well, that's just ridiculous.

Anyway, I'm not sure how it happened, but I ended up buying the book. I didn't mean to, but I did. And as I made my way from the store to the car, I told myself that I would not read the book until after I saw the movie. I promised myself over and over that I would not read it!

And then I read it.

I read half in the car before I ever even left the parking lot and the rest when I got home. Don't worry, this review will not be chock full of spoilers. As of this paragraph, I have no intention of revealing anything about the movie to you dear readers (everyone dies at the end). I will only say that after reading the book, I'm even more excited for the movie. If you do intend to read the book before seeing the movie, I'll tell you now that, although the whole story seems to be told, there are plenty of surprises left that have not been revealed by the book.

The book is put together very nicely with eight pages of color photographs, some we've already seen and others that are new to the book. Each chapter number is drawn with an accompanying Muppet (and in some cases, Muppets). These pictures were around before, and I believe they were made up a few years ago. Still, several of the drawings were new to me, and so I enjoyed seeing them.

I have one criticism of the author's writing style. Oftentimes, Ms. Turner will try to describe some of the physical gags that appear in the movie, but her words fail to capture the moment and the humor in the scene. To be fair, it is very difficult to describe physical comedy effectively, but it seems like some of these moments could have been left out of the book and saved as a nice surprise in the movie. This isn't always a problem. She seems to capture the physicality of Walter quite well.

A few thoughts on the characters (you might think they're spoilers, but I don't, so...): The Muppets are very much themselves. They seem to go through a bit more than they have in other movies. Kermit's emotional experience reminds me of The Muppets Take Manhattan. Walter is perfect. He IS all hardcore Muppet fans. I was a little worried about the Moopets, but they seem to be just right for the movie, and a nice counter to the Muppet characters.

Over all, the book is very nice. I enjoyed reading it very much. I laughed out loud a lot, sometimes uncontrollably, and I am very confident that this will prove to be a great Muppet movie.

And now I realize how very short this review is without revealing any of the spoilers from the book, and so I will end this by revealing several key story points from some of your other favorite films:

• Rosebud is a sled, but it meant so much more than that, or at least I think it did, though it could just be that Freud was a fraud and sometimes a sled is just a sled.
• Luke Skywalker is the son of Darth Vader who is the son of Shmi Skywalker which is something that nobody really cared about anyway.
• Soilent Green is people, but I think it was just the lower class, so it could still be USDA approved.
• And, finally, life is like a movie. You can write your own ending. And you should probably write your own for this review, too.

The Muppet Mindset by Ryan Dosier, ryguy102390@gmail.com

Muppet Fan Art Spotlight: Justin Piatt

Today we have a very simple, very fun, very well done article thanks to our friend and frequent Muppet Mindset contributor Justin Piatt. Justin is also a talented sketch artist who has provided us with some fantastic pieces to show off on the site. So... please enjoy our gallery of Justin Piatt artwork!

 Miss Piggy's Audition

 The Monsters Audition

 Moody Muppets Series: Fozzie Bear

 Moody Muppets Series: The Great Gonzo

 Moody Muppets Series: Rowlf the Dog

The Muppet Mindset by Ryan Dosier, ryguy102390@gmail.com

The Muppets Cake Manhattan

Okay, so this post has nothing to do with Manhattan... but "The Great Muppet Caker" just sounded stupid. Anyway... our friend Justin Piatt, who is known for his wit and dashing good showmanship, has sent us two pictures from his latest effort: baking. He worked hard to make two fun cakes, presumably just to impress us and not for consuming. Check them out below! If you have any Muppety baked goods that you would like to share with us here at The Muppet Mindset, and thus the entire world at large, send them our way! (Preferably with a nice glass of milk to wash it down with.)

The Muppet Mindset by Ryan Dosier, ryguy102390@gmail.com

Finding Your Inner Hogthrob

Justin H. Piatt - Have you ever taken that extra minute in front of the mirror to primp? Have you ever taken that extra minute in front of the mirror and forgotten why you were taking that extra minute in front of the mirror? If so, then you’ve taken your first step towards...

Finding You Inner Hogthrob

Developing character flaws is a process which takes much time and energy. And so, to aid us in our endeavors to do so, we will examine the case of one particularly flawed individual: Link Hogthrob. (“…Me?”) Yes, you.

Link, or Linkerdoodles as his mommy would refer to him, started life as most do… as a baby. A pig baby. A pig baby with a very thick skull. Mommy Hoghthrob was very proud. When questioned about her son’s childhood, Link’s mommy responded with a hearty “Oy!” We waited for the “nk,” but it was not forthcoming.

Finding your inner Hogthrob will take effort. I should know, I’ve been playing hide-and-seek with mine for weeks, and the darn thing keeps moving around. But, I promise you, finding your inner Hogthrob is well worth it.

~ Understanding Link ~
Understanding Link Hogthrob is a process which requires those interested in doing so to first understand themselves. You may ask, “But why?” to which I would respond, “Because,” and you would react confused, but would ultimately accept the answer. This is the first step to understanding Link Hogthrob. Other steps are unnecessary, and at this point would further confuse the subject.

Now that we understand Link, let’s take a look at who he is...

~ Who is Link? ~
Before you say that this is the same as understanding Link, may I point out that it is not stated the same, and is therefore different.

- Link, the Dummy -
In the unreleased documentary, “A Link in the Head is Worth Two in the What,” Dr. Julius Strangepork introduced a segment on the mysterious nature of Hogthrob with the following: “What issh Link really? Of all the dummiessh the vorld hash known, the mosht intreegink of dummiessh ish Link himshelf. Ish thish a clever ploy to dishguishe shome dark shecret? Ishh Hogthob truly a dummy? Or ish he a criminal mashtermind of epic proporshinsh? An evil genioush, perhapsh? Or maybe a shuper shecret shpy of shome short!” Unfortunately, by the film’s end, it was concluded that Link is actually nothing more than a dummy, and thus the reason it remains unreleased.

Capturing this aspect of Link’s personality will prove vital. I will ask you to attempt the following to aid you in your quest to Hogthrobiness:

1.    Close your eyes. (If frightened of dark places, try to do this while keeping the eyelids open.)
2.    Think very hard. (If near a mental state of Link, this may hurt.)
3.    Clear head of all thought.
4.    … Uhhhh… I forget this step.

Easy? Fun? Confusing? You bet! You are now nearing perfect Hogthrobitude.

- Link, the Conceited -
The interests of Link include Link. Therefore, what is of concern to Link extends to such necessary items to the perfection of Link as cologne, exercise equipment, toupees and girdles.

To find your inner Hogthrob in this important area, we will recommend perhaps joining a gym or some sort of scent of the month club. I would also suggest investing in some plastic surgery that will provide you with your very own cleft chin. This is good advice for anyone wishing to better themselves, as a cleft chin is an indication of awesome.

- Link: God of Love? -
Link Hogthrob has always been the romantic, leading man-type. From his widely reported-on encounters with groupies during the making of The Muppet Show (even stealing a few of Sylvester Stallone’s), to his on-again, off-again, on-screen, off-screen romance with the lovely and talented Miss Piggy. Die-hard fans will even recall his failed courtship with… uh, Fozzie Bear in a wig.

We asked a fellow by the name of Kermit the Frog, one of Link’s rivals in love, about his opinion of the great love aficionado that is Link Hogthrob: “Well, uh, I… He’s certainly, uh… I don’t really… ‘Rival in love?’” The frog was obviously left speechless by the Throb that is Hog.

Unfortunately, God of Love is not really something anyone can develop. One is born with this great quality, and, let’s face it, you will never be the great lover that Link Hogthrob is, no matter how hard you try… And I do recommend that you try. Go ahead. Try it. It’s what Link would do!

So in conclusion, what do we know about Link Hogthrob? What do we know about ourselves? If you can answer either of these questions, then you have failed to find your inner Hogthrob. However, if you are currently staring at your computer screen with a blank look on your face and asking yourself, “What did I just read?” then congratulations! You are reaching a higher plane of Hogthrob. Fully discovering your inner Hogthrob is close at hand. Now, if you’ll excuse me, my inner Hogthrob is running off again, and I have to go catch it.

The Muppet Mindset by Ryan Dosier