The Muppet Mindset Repentantly presents...
Live on Sesame Street
- First and foremost, come to terms with the fact that your friendly neighbors there will be monsters, talking food, singing cows, massive birds, hairy Snuffleupaguses (Snuffleupagi?), grouchy Grouches, arithmetic-loving vampires, fairies, Berts, Ernies, and normal people named Bob, Gordon, Susan, Maria, Luis, Alan, Gina, Chris, and Leela.
- Become accepting of everyone's faults and flaws and learn that everyone is special and can do anything they want if they believe in themselves.
- Sing, sing a song. Sing out loud, sing out strong. Sing of good things--not bad. Sing of happy--not sad. Make it simple to last your whole life long. Don't worry that it's not good enough for anyone else to hear. Just sing, sing a song.
- Find your niche. Will you be a grouch? A friendly monster? A caring adult? An operatic flamingo? A Count? A Snuffleupagus? Whatever you choose, you're sure to be welcome on Sesame Street.
- Learn to live with terrible waiter service when you visit Charlie's Restaurant.
- Accept that you may never be able to make fresh baked cookies again without getting visited by a large, ravenous blue monster.
- Buy a calendar so that you can clearly label every day with the Letter, Number, and Word of each day. It'll save you a lot of embarrassment if anyone--especially a celebrity--asks you about them.
- Put aside money for a roof repair budget in case Super Grover decides to pay you a visit.
- Remember that Zoe's pet rock, Rocco, is not just a rock, he's a rock with a passion for great art.
- Be careful around pumpkins. Anyone of them could be anything accidentally turned into a pumpkin by Abby Cadabby.
- Do NOT step on any insects! You never know if any of them are Twiddlebugs with a wife and kids or a worm who has been to the moon and back.
- Most of all... find out how to get, how to get to Sesame Street.
The Muppet Mindset by Ryan Dosier, firstname.lastname@example.org